Why I Quit Everything to Start Fresh at 45

SUMMARY

Suzy from A Slow Simple Life shares her personal journey of starting over in her 20s, 30s, and 40s, offering lessons on embracing balance, simplicity, and intentional living at any age.

STATEMENTS

• Every stage of life provides opportunities to rethink, reset, and rediscover what truly matters through new beginnings.
• In the 20s, the decade is marked by first experiences like jobs and loves, wired for learning and adaptation, but often leads to overloading instead of balanced growth.
• Twenties tempt one to believe in endless time, leading to neglected savings, rest, and well-being, while mistakes and regrets are essential parts of the journey.
• The 30s involve questioning paths, ending draining commitments like jobs, and starting fresh by moving to quieter places and living with less stress and possessions aligned with values.
• Starting over in the 30s creates space to hear one's true self, emphasizing that endings foster new beginnings and refinement of life.
• By the 40s, starting over becomes a practiced skill backed by clarity, reducing the chase for external validations and embracing calmness amid hormonal and life shifts.
• Midlife is not a crisis but a sifting process to hold onto meaningful daily rhythms and let go of distractions.
• Financial prudence in later years involves smarter money management, low living costs, and investing savings without high income needs.
• Living simply in the 40s focuses on intentional choices that free up time for daily pleasures rather than deprivation.
• Starting over at any age, including learning new skills like biking at 45, invites openness, patience, and alignment with what matters, turning experience into the strongest foundation.

IDEAS

• The 20s, often dubbed the defining decade, can trap individuals in a cycle of constant "yeses" that overload rather than build a sustainable self.
• Believing health and time are unbreakable in youth leads to overlooked basics like saving and resting, fostering long-term regrets.
• Thirties bring the wisdom to discern looping paths from true progress, prompting gentle exits from unfulfilling roles.
• Relocating from urban chaos to rural calm in midlife isn't mere geography—it's a reset to reconnect with personal values amid noise.
• Clarity in the 40s simplifies choices, shielding inner peace from superficial pursuits that drain energy.
• Midlife hormonal changes unexpectedly yield calmness, diminishing fears of aging and comparisons with others.
• A low-cost lifestyle at $1,000 monthly in a new country enables financial flexibility without high earnings, prioritizing experiences over accumulation.
• Learning to bike at 45 after past failures highlights that new "firsts" remain thrilling and possible at any age.
• Life's circle game, as in Joni Mitchell's lyric, means revisiting past emotions with evolved wisdom, not repetition.
• Starting from experience, not scratch, transforms potential setbacks into invitations for wiser, kinder growth.

INSIGHTS

• Balance in early adulthood prevents the illusion of endless time from eroding foundational well-being and financial stability.
• Endings in the 30s, whether jobs or locations, liberate space for value-aligned commitments, turning quietude into profound freedom.
• Midlife clarity reframes aging not as loss but as a filter for essentials, fostering unexpected peace amid transitions.
• Intentional frugality decouples financial security from high income, unlocking time for present joys over deferred dreams.
• Embracing new beginnings as skills honed over decades builds resilience, making adaptation feel empowering rather than desperate.
• Daily rhythms, nurtured through life's resets, create a sense of home that sustains intentional living beyond crises.

QUOTES

• "To make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from."
• "We can't return. We can only look behind from where we came and go round and round in the circle game."
• "Clarity makes decisions simpler. It helps you protect your peace and stop chasing things that look good on the outside but leave you drained."
• "The heart of living simply isn't about deprivation, but it's being more intentional with our choices."
• "You're not starting from scratch. You're starting from experience. And that is the most powerful place to begin."

HABITS

• Maintain balance between work, play, dreams, and well-being to avoid overload in busy decades.
• Create space for pausing and reflecting amid growth to gain clarity during high-activity periods.
• Live with less stress, possessions, and commitments that don't align with core values for greater freedom.
• Practice financial prudence by keeping monthly costs low, splitting expenses, and saving the surplus for investments.
• Pursue new "firsts" like learning skills later in life with patience and openness to sustain wonder.

FACTS

• The speaker quit a draining teaching job in her 30s to freelance and moved from a noisy city to a quiet town with her son.
• In her 40s, the family relocated to a new unfamiliar country, with her adult son moving abroad for studies.
• They switched to a DTV visa valid for 5 years, offering more flexibility and stability at a lower cost than previous options.
• Their total monthly living expenses, including rent, food, utilities, and occasional outings, are kept under $1,000, split 50/50 between spouses.
• The speaker learned to ride a bicycle at age 45 after years of near-abandonment, discovering its joys through persistence.

REFERENCES

• T.S. Eliot's quote on endings as beginnings.
• Joni Mitchell's song lyric from "The Circle Game."
• Patreon community for exclusive content on slow simple living.
• Recipe e-book by Suzy Parcero on Amazon.
• Epidemic Sound for video music.

HOW TO APPLY

• Identify draining elements in your current life, such as jobs or environments, and gently end them to create mental space, as done by leaving teaching for freelancing.
• Relocate to a quieter setting if urban noise overwhelms, bringing family along to foster collective reset and value-aligned living.
• Develop clarity by reflecting on past experiences, using it to prioritize decisions that protect peace over external appearances.
• Adopt a frugal budget by tracking essentials like rent and food to under $1,000 monthly, splitting costs and saving extras for smarter investments.
• Embrace new challenges, like learning a delayed skill such as biking, with patience through trial and error to build openness in daily routines.

ONE-SENTENCE TAKEAWAY

Starting over at any age leverages experience for simpler, intentional living full of clarity and joy.

RECOMMENDATIONS

• Prioritize balance early to safeguard well-being against the temptations of perceived endless youth.
• Question and end unfulfilling paths in your 30s to align life with true values and reduce noise.
• Cultivate midlife clarity to filter distractions, embracing calmness over crisis narratives.
• Implement low-cost intentional spending to free time for present pleasures without deprivation.
• Persistently try new "firsts" regardless of age, transforming setbacks into growth opportunities.

MEMO

In an era where reinvention often feels reserved for the young, Suzy Parcero, creator of A Slow Simple Life, challenges that notion with her candid recounting of starting over across decades. At 45, she recently learned to ride a bicycle—a skill long deferred—symbolizing the enduring thrill of new beginnings. Her journey, from the whirlwind of 20s exploration to midlife relocations, underscores that life's resets are not failures but evolutions toward intentionality.

Parcero's 20s were a frenzy of firsts: jobs, loves, mortgages, and setbacks in what she calls the "defining decade," when the brain eagerly adapts. Yet, she reflects, this period risks confusing progress with overload, neglecting savings and rest under the illusion of unbreakable health. "Be gentle with yourself," she advises, emphasizing pauses for reflection amid the rush, a lesson that tempers the era's boundless energy with sustainable balance.

By her 30s, wisdom sharpened her gaze, revealing looping paths amid tried routes. She quit a draining teaching job, embraced freelancing, and traded city clamor for a quiet town with her son. This wasn't mere change but a clearing of noise to rediscover her voice, living with less—fewer possessions, stresses, and misaligned commitments. Echoing T.S. Eliot, she notes that endings birth beginnings, refining life to cradle what matters most.

Now in her 40s, Parcero views midlife not as crisis but clarification. Hormonal shifts and upheavals—like moving to a new country on a flexible DTV visa, her son's abroad studies, and a local marriage—bring unexpected calm. She and her husband sustain a $1,000 monthly life of rent, meals, and cafes, splitting costs to save wisely despite modest incomes. This simplicity, she insists, isn't deprivation but deliberate choice, yielding time for daily joys over distant aspirations.

Parcero's story culminates in Joni Mitchell's "circle game," where we revisit life's loops wiser, clearer. Whether leaping into change or deepening routines, she reminds us: we start from experience, the mightiest launchpad. Her message resonates for anyone eyeing a reset—proof that at any age, simpler, truer living awaits through courage and reflection.